Timmmmm...

Your Life is On The Line.

Recently somebody invited me to Plurk nanaman... Haay. Actually, I've been on plurk before... Left when I was at about 65 karma points. "Why?" you ask? Let me see...

Words have always been a good friend of mine (and also one of my worst enemies). Words express me, words assure me, words reveal me, words hurt me, words betray me, words make me quiet, then words seep through me even when I'm quiet. When I'm happy, my words jump up and down with excitement about the latest movie I watched, or about the nicest song I've listened to recently. When I'm hurt, my words sound wounded and bleeding, but those same words will hear me as I stand up and rise through the situation.

I'm not a linguist, I know I'm not the best speaker, I'm not the best at debates, and I'm never a smooth talker. All I know is I speak my mind, I remain true to myself, and what you hear is what you get. I know some people who are like that, and I know it's never too late to listen to what they have to say. Chances are, you've been thinking the same things. Or not.

A friend of mine recently invited me to plurk again. No thanks. Not right now.

The thing with blogging (well micro-blogging, in plurk sense), is you kinda get so bare and exposed since you blog one-liners... might very well be what you were thinking at that very instant. Now the reason the mind doesn't have a mouth of its own is this: you don't say everything that you think of. You keep most of it to yourself. Why? Because most of it, you alone understand.. And people judge you for what they see or hear.

I've been on plurk for quite some time. But I left when I got too caught up on the "words" part of it.. Plurk seemed so free and liberating.. But as I learned the hard way, misinterpreted words and too much reading between the lines is inevitable. Karma points: 65 to Zero. Bye for now plurkers. Maybe we'll meet again, but not now.

"Cause you and I both loved what you and I spoke of
and others just read of and if you could see now
well I'm almost finally out of words."
                             - Jason Mraz (You and I Both)

Hmmm... do you think this would catch on? Hahaha.

Print tayo ng marami, para wala nang misunderstandings. Para clear diba?

When I saw this, I found this really funny! Pero when I think about it, sometimes nagkaka misunderstanding talaga. But instead of filling this up (hahaha!), let's just talk it over and get things straight.

But if you need one of these, tell me, I'll print a copy. Haha joke!

Being in love with a person isn't supposed to be a set of formal rules and following protocols. God is a creative God who is full of surprises. Sometimes, you've just got to let go and let Him work. It's not always smooth sailing as well, but the rough roads that you go through and endure is a perfect indicator that God has something great.. Everything worth having is worth fighting for.

Proverbs 30:18-19
There are three things that amaze me—
no, four things that I don’t understand:
how an eagle glides through the sky,
how a snake slithers on a rock,
how a ship navigates the ocean,
how a man loves a woman. NLT

I won't pretend I know everything about this matter. But I do know this... LOVE always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails... And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is LOVE.

1 John 4:8 Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love. 

 I know, I know... mahabang blog. Pero if you're a friend, basahin mo narin, baka na-"special mention" kita jan.

Sept 6, Watched "Westside Story" at Meralco Theatre. Advanced Happy Birthday, Lory. Hehe. Met with my highschool buddies at Katipunan after. Tumatanda na tayo, boys.
Sept 7, Had dinner with family for my sister's bday.
Sept 9, My birthday's coming up, and was suddenly a bit emo because of certain things that happened.

09/14 Sunday night before my birthday, music team surprised me during our meeting. First ever birthday surprise.. :)

Then after the meeting, Josh and TJ brought me to Sweet Insipirations, where a whole bunch of friends were waiting (gavs, sharon, king, charis, acee, anna, ena, dwyght, este, she, yvette, jeff. I hope i didn't forget anyone), surprised me again!:) Nono, glen, mark, khar, passed by too. Na-"hotseat" ako dun, oh my gulay. As in, hindi ako sanay, pero ok lang, haha!

After that, friends and I went to chat over coffee till 330am. Oi, circle of trust ha. Yeah. (Time din pala ako)

09/15 Monday, stayed at home. I should be somewhere today but it was cancelled.

09/16 Tuesday, the night before my birthday, had dinner with friends over at Katips then kwentuhan nanaman over coffee! When I got home, my family barged into my room at 12mn and greeted me a happy birthday with candles pa talaga! Haha! Love you all.

09/17 Wednesday, birthday ko na. I was supposed to be on a roadtrip to someplace but I guess next week nalang...

That morning, I finished "Joyride" cover with Chique (Waking Up The Sunrise version) for my brother's band. Met Adriel after lunch, a musician friend of mine who came home for a 1-week vacation after 7months in Hongkong. Had late (2nd) lunch with Carlo and Adriel, si Pao nalang kulang, buo na yung banda!

(At Shakey's) Carlo: [looking at our empty plates] "Simut na simot a..." Tim: [looking at menu] "It says here 'Good for 5-6 people'. Talaga lang ha.." Adriel: "5-6 na bata siguro..."

Shempre nag-Cello's doughnuts pa after. After foodtrip, the three of us went to Thirdline's studio to meet up with Tito Mon and to watch APO Hiking Society's rehearsal for their upcoming concert. Met APO after their rehearsal... whew! Nung nalaman nila na birthday ko, they sang for me!!! I wish. Haha. Pero it was great to meet them.

Later that night, I played drums, I checked my email, David treated me to dinner and unending funny stories. Haha, thanks Dave:) Then after, hanged out with King at QC center while waiting for Josh. Then 10pm, Lila, Cookie, and Tricia arrived from wherever, King convinced them na birthday ko today. I can't remember if they actually believed him eventually, but anyway, ginreet naman nila ako. So thanks ha. Hehe. Tambay sa Bo's Coffee and Eastwood with Josh, King, and TJ til 3am na ata yun.

09/18 Thursday was a blur. Pero I do remember this: "Tim, tumataba ka!" - Pat Rodriguez

09/19 Friday, "Tumataba ka na a." - photocopying lady at UP Music. Such sweet words. Hehe. I've been eating 3 servings of rice per meal everyday since June. At least may nakapansin na kahit papano that I gained 5pounds. Haha! Hanged out with UP Music friends sa isang coffee place and got wet from the rain (si pat and phoebe kasi kanta ng kanta e). Ayan nostalgia nanaman dahil sa ulan. After that, I attended youth service and listened to Nono preach. Naaaks. Happy birthday Kelvin, dami natin September celebrants ah! Sayang, sana sumama ako sa inyo sa Morato, or kahit sumunod nalang ako. Pero ok lang, had dinner with Sky, Fem, Chique, and ex-"dotamates" (hehe, di na ako naglalaro e). Favorite fish with tofu. Tapos Marjolaine cake ng Red Ribbon from Fem and Sky, one of my faves. yeaah.

After dinner, went and met Este, etc. at Sweet Inspi. Here we go again, na-interview nanaman ako dun. Haha. Naging seryosong usapan tuloy about life . Hehe. After that, I went to meet Josh, Sharon, Charis, King, TJ, and David for more dessert haha. Nagtext si Nono, they're playing Dota raw for my birthday, bakit daw wala ako? Yeah right, as if para sakin talaga yang Dota na yan. Haha. Excuses. Pero anyway, sumunod kami ni King, ayan tuloy, talo kayo sakin. Went home after that. Baka matalo pa. Hehe.

09/20 Saturday, "Belated Happy Birthday!", Kim Garcia greeted me during music practice. "Thank you!", I replied. Dapat pala "Belated Happy Birthday rin!" 'cause it was her birthday pala nung 18th! magkasunod lang kami. Haha! Sorry Kim. During lunch naman, Tin goes, "Happy Birthday!", [habang binibigay sakin yung egg yolk ng tapsilog nya.] Haha! Thanks Tin! ;-p After music practice sa Cubao, I went to meet Nicole and Carlo to watch APO's concert! SUPER GALING. Would you believe, during 39 years of performing, it was the first time APO performed in Araneta Coliseum?? Whaaat? Those guys are so awesome. That concert was AMAZING. I have to write another blog for this.

09/21 Sunday, woke up early to play in 1st and 2nd service. Got interviewed regarding DVD piracy while I was waiting for a ride to Katipunan. Had lunch with peeps at Perspolis before final rehearsals with Nik and Carlo before our gig at 70's Bistro on Sept 23, 930pm (NOOD KAYO!!!:-D). After rehearsal, met up with people sa UP as 4th service was about to end. Went to Eastwood for dinner (treat ako ni Acee! naks naman!) with LA, Macy, Lorenzo, Jay, Mac, Josh, King, Jeff, David, Joey, James, Dar, Charis, Johanna, Ena, Anna, Dwyght, Sharon, etc. (Ang hilig ko mag-enumerate ngayon a). After dinner, hangout with people sa Coffee Bean, then after a while decided to go to Antipolo. Haha. Thanks Acee, etc!

Well, there it was. My birthday week was really a fun and happy one. "Was it un-sad?", you ask? As a friend of mine says: "Ah eh ih oh uh.." Well.. [ahem, ahem].. Missed my friends who weren't there.. Crisa, missing in action. It's ok, I know you we're busy with MPD. Ivy, nasan ka ha?!! And others na hindi ko na na-mention.

Thanks everyone, narealize ko time-person din pala ako. Kaya sometimes nostalgia talaga pag wala akong kasama. Haha. Words and Time? Nako, kaya pala ang hilig ko sa chat over coffee lately. Haha. Those who know me, alam nyo na minsan it just takes a meaningful conversation and a day hanging out to really make it worthwhile. See you around... :)

This is the very first time I've written a birthday wishlist..

1.)

2.)

3.)

4.)

5.)

And it's an empty list...

 

All I want is an "un-sad" birthday.

I've always wanted to do something like this... Kaya lang, I never found the people willing to try it with me... Anyone of you are game? Hehe. Aminin, lalo na mga broadway musical junkies out there, naisip nyo na to at one point or the other noh?!... Kahit konti?... Hindi?...

Tingnan nyo to, hindi naman sila mga singers talaga, mga malalakas lang loob. The people in the foodcourt had no idea, bigla nalang nanggaling kung saan-saan yung cast and they started singing.. Haha!:-) Looked like tons of fun, worth doing kahit once diba?:-)

FOOD COURT MUSICAL by Improv Everywhere

Now on a serious note, a thought came to mind:-)

To save face, we usually do a lot of things that really isn't being honest to ourselves to begin with. For example, if you'd like to sing in front of a big crowd, go ahead and do it! If people don't remember you for your awesome voice, chances are, they'll remember you as "the one who tried". Not bad if you ask me. I'd rather be the one who tried, than the one who regrets not having tried it at all;-)

I always say, "there's always a first time for everything", and that's what'll keep me doing things and discovering things. These "insanities" would include, in no particular order:

• jumping out of a plane and sky-surfing,
• playing a gig on a rooftop somewhere,
• skating on a real hockey rink,
• competing in a go-cart race,
• riding horseback over rough terrain,
• learning japanese katana,
• plus a lot more...

Sure, it doesn't really sound insane, does it? What's insane is dreaming of all these things and not getting to try them.

Don't let anyone tell you what you can and can not do. Be honest with yourself and do not be swayed by how others think of you. That's the only way to live life.

"...I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full." (John 10:10)

 

I was on the verge of posting one of the poems I wrote, but I guess this one pretty much feels the same..

 

Tonight I Can Write The Saddest Lines

Tonight I can write the saddest lines.
Write, for example, ΄The night is starry
and the stars are blue and shiver in the distance.΄

The night wind revolves in the sky and sings.
Tonight I can write the saddest lines.
I loved her, and sometimes she loved me too.

Through nights like this one I held her in my arms.
I kissed her again and again under the endless sky.

She loved me, sometimes I loved her too.
How could one not have loved her great still eyes?

Tonight I can write the saddest lines.
To think that I do not have her. To feel that I have lost her.

To hear the immense night, still more immense without her.
And the verse falls to the soul like dew to the pasture.

What does it matter that my love could not keep her.
The night is starry and she is not with me.

This is all. In the distance someone is singing. In the distance.
My soul is not satisfied that it has lost her.

My sight tries to find her as though to bring her closer.
My heart looks for her, and she is not with me.

The same night whitening the same trees.
We, of that time, are no longer the same.

I no longer love her, that΄s certain, but how I loved her.
My voice tried to find the wind to touch her hearing.

Another΄s. She will be another΄s. As she was before my kisses.
Her voice, her bright body. Her infinite eyes.

I no longer love her, that΄s certain, but maybe I love her.
Love is so short, forgetting is so long.

Because through nights like this one I held her in my arms
my soul is not satisfied that it has lost her.

Though this be the last pain that she makes me suffer
and these the last verses that I write for her.

-Pablo Neruda

WAKING UP THE SUNRISE is featured at this month's Jazz page at MusikLokal.com! Check it out and spread the love!:)

Thanks for the support, friends and family!

Here's the link: http://www.musiklokal.com/cgibin/members/members_profile.php?usr=1441

This is totally unlike me...

Being a person who's been constantly ranting about the things that go wrong, and the things that could go wrong in this world (that basically covers everything), I didn't expect to be writing this.

I have been looking back at my posts, and I realized the amount of frustration I've let out in these pages. Not to worry, I'm not that miserable *wink*. The blog has just been my personal space where I could write anything and not care about anything. Just so happens frustrations tend to be one of the most inducive reasons to spend time in front of the computer. I've been talking about the uselessness of being engulfed in things that "doesn't matter", like blogging about how your dog ran around counter-clockwise instead of clockwise (which he always does). I haven't been a believer of the whole "profile" thing, listing things you like, how you want your pancakes, and that you like walking barefoot in gravel (ouch). But recently, I learned that as I longed for genuine human connection, I'm missing it.

Baby steps. Here's the Tim, I think I've come to know:

• Books are great, I wish I had more money (books in the Philippines are insanely priced). Pablo Neruda, Haruki Murakami, Shel Silverstein. I have all their work. Well I would, if I could. Pages are preserved passions and impressions.
• Music is eternal, that's why I love it so much. In music, Jazz is the extension of the musician's soul. Orchestration is the call to an awakening. John Pizzarelli, Gilbertos, Jobim, everyone who does music for Disney, Gerard Salonga, and all those incredible arrangers out there. I'll have music even after I die, but I don't need to wait to enjoy it.
• I appreciate the seemingly mundane things, and wonder why too few people overlook it. The raindrops on your palms (recently, I watched someone enjoy it as much as I did, and I knew people are missing so much by using an umbrella). God didn't create these things just to make the world turn. We're meant to enjoy it also.
• I love spontaneity.. That's why I believe in being candid.
• I used to hate the employee-employer relationship. I knew I shouldn't.
• I want new things, new skills, new places, new people. Life is too short to live "safe". Jonathan Larson's Rent is heart-wrenching, but hopeful.
• I wanna meet people who aren't afraid to know that there's so much out there. I wanna meet those who would seize the moment not out of urgency but out of fun. I wanna meet people who like what I like... to the point that they almost tell me what like. Haha.

Unclutter your mind, if you can't unclutter your room. The best things in life is being who you are and enjoying it freely. To all you who'd love to enjoy life, this is for you. Let's meet somewhere and enjoy it together, how about that? Libre ko kape. Haha...

Have you ever caught yourself wondering? Wondering why? Why you can't move? Move forward?

You wake up, dress up for work, get your hair ruined on the jeep ride to the train station.

You stand in the platform, staring blankly at the "Stresstabs" ad.

You cram yourself in the train where you practically breathe the breath of other people (if not their B.O.), then when you get off at your stop, you finally breathe some "fresh air" (freshly polluted, that is).

You wish it was over since it's been an hour after you left your house, but the office is still another jeepney ride away. So as you lug around "your" MacBook (yours for now at least), you ask yourself , "I haven't clocked in for the day, yet I'm already exhausted"...

You arrive at your place of work where "Excellance is Our Way of Life". You muster up your strength to smile at your "excellant" boss (if your boss is there already). He/She probably is 'coz he/she's got a fast car to get there.

You spend the day bustin' your butt, doing everything in your job description and then some. You spend your break doing favors for officemates and following-up deadlines of other people who are too busy sipping their Starbucks coffee that they bought using money from their high paychecks. You can never get your work done because they submit late. And at the end of it all, you take the fall. You think, "All this and yet THEY get paid more?"

You don't get noticed, you don't shine, and you don't get what your true excellence deserved. And the only time the company gave you a raise was when they realized that they forgot.

After O.T., you "relax" by walking alone slowly to the terminal.. The only thing that let's you survive your trip back home is your frustration. You're too distracted to worry about the rainy weather and the pain in your feet from standing in the train.

You get back to your house, lie in your bed and wonder... "How many days can I extend my paycheck until I'm gonna have to pawn my phone?"

You fall asleep before coming up with an answer.

This is a message to all of us. Let's examine our lives, and the people around us, our subordinates in particular. We're all working hard, so let's treat people the way we want to be treated. Let's give people what they truly deserve.

Stop the politics, let's not pay more because the person "is a friend".

Please reward excellence and hardwork, not proximity.

 

Wanna put your life into high gear? Wanna live life to the full? Go to "ZERO OR MAX" , Sundays UP Film Center.

January 28. Uhmm... that's about it. The title is pretty much what I wanted to say.. hehe. PLEASE WATCH US!! and support Bembol Rockers! (Chique and I are fans.. and it's a pleasure to finally play with them!)

Mag:net Katips, Jan.28, 8:30pm. See you there!

Woke up at 4:10am, breathing hard, because in my dream, I was eating what seemed to be an "octuple cheese" pizza. (Why I was out of breath, I didn't know). I got out of bed and decided to check if have toothpaste. (What!?) If not, I'll write it down in my "To Buys" list.

When I got to the bathroom, I turned on the light and I saw myself with the weirdest bed-head I've ever had. (Take note: this is 100% natural bed-head hairstyling) It was the coolest thing I've seen at 4:13 in the morning and just so happens I had my camera with me (how convinient). And I can't believe you're actually spending time to read a piece-of-crap post like this...

Come to think of it, this "weblog" thing we've got nowadays is the only place where even the:

insanely boring stories,
immensely tasteless ideas,
or infinitely worthless things could be so much fun.

This is the only place where you would find blogposts that would inevitably taunt you to react with "So what??". Or maybe photo albums with a header like "Magnificent Sunsets" that misleads you and you end up replying with "What the...!!!?" But then again, nobody forced you to read on...

I wouldn't know if anybody would even begin to have a clue about what I'm saying, so I'm not asking you to wipe that crazy, puzzled look in your face. I imagined that would happen.

Now, if you want to be polite and respond (since I'll probably see your headshot in the "Viewed By" section at the bottom and wonder why you didn't reply) but you have no idea what to say or you're trying to save some time ('coz we've wasted so much already), please just kindly highlight and copy the next sentence and paste it the reply box:

What the hell are you talking to me?